The April Autistic Debacle: Autism Awareness/Acceptance Month, Mark Rober and his celebrity laced telethon for Next for Autism, TikToker counter …
I promised I would shift my creative energies towards Autistic Advocacy. With that said, please enjoy this, the first episode of my new YouTube series, The Autistic OS. This episode concerns autistic social communication, specifically, in the area of social reciprocity.
When I began this blog and when I entered the social media landscape as Cornflower Girl, I did not set out to be an Autistic Creator. I did set out to produce content to which others could relate, which would, hopefully, facilitate catharsis for wounded souls in need of balm, like my own. I began creating content for online consumption long before I ever realized I am Actually Autistic. It all began with a novel project, which I have referenced from time to time within these pages, and while I’ve shelved that particular endeavor (for who knows how long?) it did play a necessary role in my personal evolution.
As an autistic person, I often struggle to understand the origins of my feelings, in spite of the fact that they overwhelm me. Creating content like this helps me understand myself better. It helps me to reframe the narrative of my experience, contextualizing all within the landscape of family dysfunction, and the disconnect between my experience and my parents’ perception of me.
To look at me now, it is obvious that I am an all around nonconformist, but I have not always been this way. In fact, my ability to give no f*** is a newly developed skill.
Below you will find my most recent podcast episode! Here is a brief excerpt to peak your interest: “I would …
I feel as though I am caught up within the vortex of a whirlwind these days. Last week, I labored to prepare my kids for the start of our remote learning school year, and this week, we’ve begun. Yet, just after the first morning’s classes, my youngest discovered a boil on her gum, so she had to have an emergency tooth extraction this morning. What a way to begin an already strange and uncertain year!
Such neurotypical world bleeds in black and white, but we neurodivergent humans are considered a spectrum for good cause. There is middle ground. We can learn to make use of offensive hygienic commodities by finding those least offensive to our tastes, but our neurotypical friends and family should meet us halfway by advocating for us, instead of against us–forcing us to suppress our legitimate concerns and discomfort for the sake of their own.
Wanna know how I Survived the Shit?! I finally, after a million years, recognized that it came from someone else to begin with! Don’t get me wrong–I am a firm believer in taking personal responsibility for my own actions–but personal responsibility does not require accepting responsibility for things others do to me.
There are parts of my personality and existence for which I’ve felt inordinate shame. These are things I’ve long repressed, pretending they were never actually part of my lived experience.Receiving my autism diagnosis has forced me to confront and scrutinize these. Today, I need to talk about meltdowns.